Joseph Bevan’s 2024 book, “Two Families: A Memoir of English Life During and After the Council” gave an honest appraisal of the confusion and chaos experienced by ordinary Catholics around the time of Vatican II. As one of thirteen children, who went on to become a father of ten, Joseph is also well-placed to enlighten young families about their responsibilities in regard to bringing children up in the Faith, as well as to give practical advice about parenting. Joseph recently agreed to do the following email interview with this author, for which I express my heartfelt gratitude.
You are blessed to have all ten of your children continuing to practise the Faith into adulthood. While a good deal of credit for this goes to their education and to good examples of you and your wife, can we also assume that the presence of a priest in your home for many years, with the graces from his daily Masses, also played some part?
Joseph: The presence of traditional priests in our home was a great source of graces for the family, and we were very fortunate to have them. For most families, however, it may not be feasible to give a home to a priest, and in any case, we always supported our local SSPX parish. It is essential that the family has regular access to good and holy priests. If the ban on the traditional Latin Mass gets any worse, there may be many more priests looking to move in with Catholic families.
You mention several times the damage done by parents who allow disparagement of the clergy in their homes and of the necessity of instilling respect for those in religious vocations to their children. Do you have any advice on how to explain to children the dangers of Modernism without them becoming cynical or bitter? How did you navigate this dilemma?
Joseph: Parents must be well versed in the causes of the crisis in the Church, but I think it is very important that the family does not descend into hot debates about this subject. Children especially, are influenced much more by what they see, rather than what they hear. If they can see mum and dad loving God and praying regularly on their knees and also observe the holiness of the Traditional Latin Mass, they will draw their own conclusions. We are talking here about conversion, rather than conviction. With this spiritual formation, as they get older, the children will convince themselves of the dangers of Modernism, but mum and dad must be clear about the crisis and its causes so that they are able to answer questions raised by their offspring in all charity. If they display any doubts, resentment or even disagreement, this can be very damaging for the family.
Joseph, your book draws a direct line from the traumas of your childhood to the faithful Catholic man you are today, never ignoring the wounds, but pointing to them as a source of sanctification. You even suggest that there is a benefit to being bullied as it taught you to accept unfairness – something that all of us have to experience at one time or another. How quick should parents be to remove their children from situations of bullying or similar harassment? Should children be encouraged to endure these situations? Is there a limit?
Joseph: Bullying is a complicated subject because children who receive this treatment often bring it upon themselves by displaying vulnerability or haughtiness. I say in my book that acceptance of unfairness applies to the victims of unfair treatment at the hands of teachers, parents, employers etc… Bullying, or unkindness of any kind, is a wicked thing and has to be rooted out in schools and families. Parents and teachers must always be vigilant. At the boys’ school in France, where my boys were educated, bullying always led to expulsion of the culprits.
One theme of your book was the attitude of self-doubt that crept into the Church after the Council. One is reminded of Pope Paul VI’s 1968 Address to the Lombard Seminary at Rome in which he said that “The church finds herself in an hour of anxiety, a disturbed period of self-criticism, or what would even better be called self-destruction.” After experiencing this self-destruction first-hand, why do you think the hierarchy has not faced the consequences of the Council and attempted to undo the damage?
Joseph: It’s all pretty hopeless! Most of the Catholic hierarchy are now ignorant about the true teachings of the Church, thanks to Vatican II, the New Mass and modern seminaries. In fact, the reason why they are bishops and cardinals is because of their fidelity to the current errors. Even basic dogmas, such as ‘no salvation outside the Catholic Church’ have been either sidelined or qualified out of existence. The pre-conciliar Church, to them, is now lost in the mists of time and is often referred to as the bad old days. If the hierarchy started preaching true dogma, they may even risk arrest and imprisonment! Short of divine intervention on a massive scale, the future looks bleak. And yet history teaches us that we, as individuals, have to convert ourselves, our families and our nearest and dearest. That has to be the answer, which is contained in the first commandment.
In your book, you stated that the Crisis in the Church happened because Catholics “stopped praying and started talking,” Could you expand on this, especially in light of the multitude of Catholic podcasters, bloggers and You-tubers that abound today?
Joseph: This “stopped praying and started talking” was something said to me by the late Fr Hugh Thwaites SJ. There is no doubt that there’s a lot of good stuff on the internet concerning doctrinal matters. However, the proliferation of ‘gossipy’ websites do little good for the simple reason that the bloggers and You-tubers disagree, often fundamentally, with the causes of the crisis in the Church and its possible remedies. If you want to preserve what is left of your Catholic Faith, time spent on Youtube may be better utilised by studying the teachings of the Faith, rather than speculating about whether the new Pope is going to do this or that.
Joseph, your book highlights the role played by sacred music in your life and in the lives of your extended family members. Have you any advice for parents struggling with children who are enamoured of modern, secular music?
Joseph: I grew up with ‘pop’ music, which had become the new staple diet of most youngsters in the 1960’s and 1970’s. Such music appeals to the passions, by inducing people to want to jump up and down. Much of it promotes vice, lack of inhibition and rebellion. Those who are addicted, and it is an addiction, to this stuff are often completely unable to respond to the music of Mozart. To them, The Marriage of Figaro is a meaningless noise.
It would be fatal for parents to take a hard line and ban pop music in the home as this action will probably drive the problem underground. Then, for the children, the music will become an additional symbol of rebellion as they retreat to their bedrooms and don headphones. From a human point of view, this is one of those insoluble problems which is supernatural in its origin, hence the need for supernatural remedies.
It is the chief duty of all parents to pray for their children and, by doing so, demonstrate a deep love for Our Lord and His Mother. Every morning, mum and dad absolutely must kneel down and pray earnestly for that gift of love. I am not talking about rattling off scores of prayers, but more a short heart-felt petition to Heaven. Family rosary is also essential. A prayerful household is a peaceful household.
Joseph Bevan’s new book is now available on Amazon:
Go here to purchase if you live in the UK
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